“You cannot solve a problem from the same consciousness that created it. You must learn to see the world anew.”
Albert Einstein
In 2006 I had the revelation that if I did everything I thought I should do, I would finally attain the life I imagined possible. So I set about exactly that: I ate a rigid diet, exercised zealously, cleaned out all my closets, scrubbed my floors, re-decorated my home (buying new furniture, painting rooms, etc), and applied myself relentlessly to improving my love life and career.
As a result of my efforts I gained weight, stagnated in my work, and traumatized myself in relationships. My one-bedroom apartment did end up looking rather spiffy though.
I had a period following this in which I spiraled into despair. It’s one thing not to try and imagine what would happen if you did. It’s another thing to try with everything you have and fail completely at every endeavor. It didn’t matter what I did, the universe had banned me from a successful life and I was left to struggle helplessly like a bug at a window forever.
So that was fun. However, after about two years of that experience I decided I would like to try something else. With retrospect I can explain how I began to improve my situation, though at the time it seemed sort of magical.
I grew patient.
The key flaw in my 2006 efforts was I believed if something hadn’t happened yet it couldn’t happen at all. Therefore I operated out of an emergency now-or-never mode that was sabotaging to say the least.
When 2008 arrived I recognized that I didn’t know how to achieve the results I wanted, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t happen. In an act of surrender, I took my foot off the accelerator and slowed down enough to learn how to drive.
Problem-solving consciousness is linear, goal oriented. It is reactive to negative emotions and likes extremes. Slowing down and taking your time feels ineffectual to the problem-solver, and possibly like admitting defeat. I didn’t stop trying for the extreme until I was absolutely certain it wouldn’t work.
Patience operates out of trust. It knows that something is coming, and is willing to be still long enough for it to show up. Its actions are reaching but subtle. When I couldn’t lose weight living on vegetables and exercising 7 days a week I tried eating whatever I wanted on the condition I eat slowly and enjoy it. I quickly lost 15 lbs, and another 20 as time progressed. With this new philosophy my relationship experiences and living situation also improved within a year, and I became psychic which was a career development I never could have imagined for myself.
When you feel like you are stuck no matter what you do, slow down and look for the subtle action. In my experience, the gentle choice is where the most change takes place.
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